December 5th we had a challenge gift to finish the hospital building and pay for the basic furniture needed. Our Goal is $32,000. The family that issued the challenge said that they would match dollar for dollar until January 31, 2017. Here is our progress! Still time to get your gift in before year end. You can give here: Converge HIV Project Account
I am thinking this month about Christmas. In our part of very rural Nigeria there are not really any reminders here that scream out, “Christmas is coming, you must hurry!”. In fact I doubt if most of the people I know will receive any gifts, but will spend time with the family that they are able to be with and eat rice, maybe foofoo, and cake if they are very fortunate. Dan and I will be together in our house enjoying a day where things will be a little slower. No tree, no presents, no Christmas cookies (I will make no-bake with oatmeal and cocoa) as Dan loves those and we have the supplies here to make them. No Ho Ho Mint Mocha or Fa lalala Latte this year. It is good, we are blessed. It is different this year and I want to share it with you. We feel like we have run a marathon for the last two years and our bodies and minds are saying, “Stop!”. With Dan being on crutches the last three weeks that has not helped our feeling of, “I need a vacation!”. The thing that blesses and encourages us is that We ARE doing what God has called us to do and we will plan a little better for some relaxation during our furlough time as we do not get any down time in Nigeria. We love being here, but we miss family, tradition, and friends. I don’t want any condolences please. We have chosen this, it is our choice and we have been and are blessed to be able to watch God work in the ways that we get to. But it is messy!
That brings me to Christmas, the day we celebrate when Jesus was born. I love art, I love old masters, Spanish, all kinds of art and architecture. I chose this picture because it is not as “clean” as a lot of nativity pictures. Jesus is next to the lamb, and everything has a cast of dirt on it to me. Now friends, if we really could see a picture of what things looked like after Jesus was born and “laid in the manger”. This is how I picture it after living in a developing country in the twenty-first century, now remember, we are speaking of the first century. This is what I envision, animals and the things that come with animals, urine, poop, smell, dirt floor or rock floor, hay (If you are not a farm person, hay is not soft, believe me!) no running water, no supplies, sweat, blood, pain, rats, mice, cockroaches, flies those are the givens, who knows what else?
Jesus came into this world that was a mess and it was all around Him! He came that we might have life and have it abundantly! The first visitors were the Shepherds who were watching their flocks at night. The sign that they found the right baby would be that he would be wrapped in “swaddling clothes”, I truly believe that it was baby clothes that Mary was given on their journey to Bethlehem. In that era and here in Nigeria currently most babies didn’t wear diapers or clothes. They were naked until they were potty trained. The richer people would have baby clothes, but not everyone. Of course the other sign would be that he was lying in a manger. A food trough full of hay, dried grass, maybe other animal food as well.
Jesus came into this world of sin and sorrow so that we may have hope and life. Is your world messy? I tell Dan all the time that life is messy and ministry is even messier. Some days I am amazed at how Satan can deceive and torture people and the lives that are hurt, damaged, and lost in the process. I am not a theologian by any stretch, I adhere to pre-school theology as this is the age of people I have ministered to most of my life. Pre-schoolers live in a world that is simple. Bad choices get bad consequences. Jesus can help you, He is your best friend if you ask Him to be. It is that simple! Life will still be messy, sometimes days will totally suck the life out of you, but you still have Jesus. He is THE answer. Consequences won’t go away, bad stuff will still happen, you may get discouraged occasionally, but He is there and He is helping you navigate through the mess, through the pain, through the hurt and to His loving arms of hope and healing. He is a Restorer!
Merry Christmas! My point for today is this: If you do not know Jesus, this Jesus of Christmas, this Jesus born in a mess to help people living in messes. This Jesus of Hope. Find a evangelical church this weekend and find out more or you can also send me a message. He loves you and so do I!
December 5th we had a challenge gift to finish the hospital building and pay for the basic furniture needed. Our Goal is $32,000. The family that issued the challenge said that they would match dollar for dollar until January 31, 2017. Here is our progress!
These lilies are just beautiful and we have quite a few plants by the house here in Gembu. Because our dogs Lady and Tramp think that flowers are better than bones to chew on, we have to put the fences up to keep the dogs out. For some reason these lilies are always poking out of the fences and because of that they get fairly mauled by the dastardly duo.
As I see these lilies frequently around the house this time of year, I have started to think about how much I have been like these beautiful, silly flowers. I have been thinking about it a lot this week. When you have 34 hours in the car with things packed all around you and reading or playing solitaire make you nautious, you think.
When I was a child, I was a pleaser. My designated role in the household was caretaker, and I embraced that role. Being the oldest child, I believed that everything I did had to be perfect and there was no alternative. If anything was less than perfect, I was mad at myself. I was mad at myself ALOT! I also believed that as long as everyone thought I was perfect and I could be sneaky about my non-perfect ways, it was permissible.
Well, as I grew into a young woman, wife, and mother I tried my best to be the perfect homemaker, mother, apartment manager, daycare provider, president of the womens group, etc. but I also thought that if I walk that line as close as I could to the edge between what I wanted and what God wanted of me and for me I would be okay. You see I was judgmental of those “less perfect” beings out there in the world. Moping around without a plan, the poor slobs just couldn’t help themselves! Of course, I thought they needed my “perfect, inexperienced, judgmental” advice! Guess how that worked? I think you know!
It has taken me so long to realize that the biggest change in my life has happened when I realized in my heart, not just my head, that I was not going to be perfect. Perfect is a lie! I was going to have to accept the fact that this lie that I have been deceived into believing was just that. A lie! I did not need a huge house, the perfect car, preppy looking children with adorable manners. I needed Jesus. Only Jesus.
The more I get to know Jesus and the God of the Bible, the more I realize that I want to be as far away from that fence as possible. Why would I want to be so close to things that tempt me or cause me to stumble, or people that bring out the gossip, hate-monger in me? I don’t. Not anymore.
You may be thinking, “that’s easy for you to say, Tina, you live in the middle of nowhere and are not in this real, dog-eat-dog world”. That is true, but here in Nigeria many times a day it seems there are so many things here that I have to look at through my father’s eyes, because to me it is just bizarre, evil, and weird!
This relationship with Jesus started 41 years ago and it is a day by day, minute by minute thing. Each morning and through the day I need to pray that I can see what He wants me to see and do what He wants me to do. No more, no less. I do have my own agenda of things I would like to get done, but I now hold that a lot looser than I used to. I am choosing to fully embrace and live in His strength and not my own. I can not do that anymore, living on my own strength has gotten me hurt, disappointment, and pain. I have found that living in His strength has given me such freedom and joy that it is really hard to describe. At this point of my life I am just trying to keep up with what He is doing through the ministry and the wonderful people He has placed in our lives and take it one day, one minute at a time.
Sorry for the rambling (remember long car ride). I do have a point for this week: My point is this. When you walk that tight rope between the world and God’s plan for your life there is a danger. The danger is that it is easier to fall into the world and you spend valuable time and energy trying to stay on that line. Stay away from the line. Get as far away as you can and embrace what He has for you this minute, this day, spend your energy and time on these things.
I know it is not Thanksgiving yet, but we will be traveling and will not have much computer access so I decided to post about one of the things that has helped me immensely through my life and is relevant with Thanksgiving approaching.
Back in the late 80’s, early 90’s I was a HUGE Oprah fan. I made sure every day when she came on I was there, the kids were napping and I learned. One of the things I learned about was an “Attitude of Gratitude”. I know, this concept was not a new thing to planet Earth, but it was new to me as a young woman, wife, and mother.
My mother used to tell me to eat my food because there were people starving in other countries. This SHOULD have made me grateful, instead my ungrateful, chubby heart said, “Send it to them, they must like raisins in their oatmeal or rice pudding”. Not very grateful! Well as I have now spent 30 years of trying to cultivate a grateful heart I see so much clearer now that it has colored and still colors my life in beautiful ways!
We as Christians should be the shiniest, happiest, most joyful people on the planet. We should utterly be exploding with LOVE! Jesus died for me, He has given me freedom to do so much more than I can imagine, and freedom from the things that harm me most. He is there, always there. He gives me wisdom, insight beyond myself. He had a purpose for my life even before I was born. Each day I work on making sure that I am doing that and only that. I have the freedom to put my wishes, wants, and problems aside. THEY ARE HANDLED. HE HAS IT COVERED!
Friends, this is the core of my being at this stage of my life. I am His and He is mine! On top of this I was born American. I am very proud to be an American and I know that I have been very privileged to have been raised in a low to middle class family with Christian values. I have had education, I have been able to voraciously read books. Books at my disposal since before I could even read. I am privileged to be here in Nigeria serving people that have not been as privileged as I have been with Earthly things as well as Spiritual leadership. I get to be here on the ground and see their faces, interact with, teach, and provide things that help people, hopefully generations of people that are created in God’s image will be affected. I get to see that with my own eyes. Dan and I have a very large team of supporters and we are privileged that we get THAT job.
I am grateful for the very hard times of learning. I have found as I look back at areas of my life, that the growth in all areas, mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and relationally have been after making big mistakes, stupid choices, and then learning tools to improve in those areas. I have learned to apologize first, and that my pride can be one of my biggest obstacles to me being a healthy person.
My point for today is this: In looking at your day to day life how can you cultivate an attitude of gratitude in your daily walk? How can you make it an integral part of YOU?
Today, November 11 is Dan’s 56th birthday. My birthday had me reminiscing and now it’s time to tell you about this man that I married so very long ago and how I have seen God shape him into the person he is now.
The first birthday I celebrated with Dan was his 19th birthday. I wish I had a picture to post on here about what he looked like at 19! He was the cutest boy I had ever met and really had gotten to know him when I was 11 and he was 14. I was not really shy after I got to know him and used to tell him he had a cute “baby face”. That might have been my 11 year old self flirting with him lol!
There have been many birthdays since then, and a lot of good times and a lot of bad times too. But to tell you the truth, the bad times were made better most of the time with his positive outlook of most situations and his strength of character. His favorite saying is, “It is what it is”. That is about as negative as he gets.
Dan is consistent. He is the first person I ever knew who was the same if he was at church, at work, home, with children, with CEO’s or with truck drivers. He was consistent and did not change. Growing up I didn’t really experience that. It seemed that you had “faces” for who you were with and what the situation was. It took me many years to trust that Dan WAS and WOULD BE the same in any situation. He wasn’t hiding anything. His value system and actions were consistent. He has taught me this.
Dan is a “Learner”. Here he is this past week at the Global Leadership Summit that we held for 64 Nigerian leaders from our area. He has always loved self-improvement and that is one thing that I have learned from him. A good leadership book or training can always help you self-evaluate and see how you can be better in daily life and leadership roles. I have watched him lead and lead well in good and heart-breaking circumstances.
Dan is a family man. He loves his family. There is nothing that he would not do for any of his family. Our family is very broad. Starting with me and our two sons and daughter in law, Katie. Then we have his biological family, my biological family, teenagers that lived with us, good friends, friends of our boys, our church family. NOTHING that he would not do to help his church, friends, or family. I have seen him sacrifice many things to help someone in need or do something that he saw that needed to be done for someone. He is that man.
Dan is a strategic planner. He sees things that amaze me. Over a year ago he told me that when he looks around our compound here in Nigeria he sees buildings where the trees are, ministry buildings to further our scope of ministry here in Gembu. He did not start doing anything about these buildings physically until we got the go-ahead from God to start clearing land, and preparing. Two of those buildings are underway right now. He has taught me that just because God has given you a dream, does not mean that you run right out and do that without first doing your homework and planning.
Dan is a “nerd”. I hate to say this but in 1981 Dan drug me to a college class on Basic Computer Programming. I really did not see the “potential” of computers and really only went because he wanted me to go with him and we were dating lol. Well, he has continued to research and explore opportunities, new ideas and technology that can further work, whether it be for God or in a business application. For a couple of years we thought God might be calling us into a ministry to use his IT and technical brain. We were right, we just didn’t know it was going to be in Nigeria.
Dan is a hard worker. Okay he is a workaholic! He has taught me that if you have a dream, if God has given you a vision, it is not going to come easy. At one time in our marriage he was working five part-time jobs. This was very hard on him physically, but with God’s help we were able to dig out of the financial situation we were in. Whatever he does he does with his whole heart. We are both like that. But I have to say, he has pulled me up, rather then pushed me from behind in this. We are still working on the how to take a break to recover and rejuvenate. In our missionary location there is no place to have “dates”, no place to “get away”. We are here on the compound, and there are a lot of things to do to move forward. This is one thing we are still working on, but we will get it figured out. We had a good plan while we lived in the States, we just need to get it figured out for our life now.
I am with Dan 24 hours a day now, all day, every day. I love him more then I did at his 19th birthday and am excited to see how the Lord will use him during this coming year of ministry.
My point for today is this: If you are married, really get to know your spouse. The best gift you can ever give your husband is your consistent prayers, your time, love, and your respect. We have used many resources over the years to help us with that. I have not used them, WE have used them together.
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